Solar flares are a myth... it's really Chuck Norris' flashlight.
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Chuck Norris found the stairway to heaven, but he prefers the elevator.
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Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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The Beatles' song "HELP" was written after they met Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
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Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
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Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a case for his phone.
The ground is afraid to break it.
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Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
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