Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS: The World orients itself to where he wants to go.
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It's a proven fact that you will go blind faster staring at a picture of Chuck Norris than you would staring at the sun.
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If you type Chuck Norris into Microsoft Word, the little paper-clip just hangs himself.
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Chuck Norris lit a match and ended the Cold War.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an Ipod, he has an Ifist.
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Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
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Justin Bieber was inspired by Usher because of his music and dance, Usher was inspired by Michael Jackson The King of Pop, Michael Jackson was inspired by...Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is who killed Kenny.
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Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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At the age of 17, Chuck Norris was fired from his job in a car factory because he roundhouse-kicked a car in half.
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