Chuck Norris does not need deodorant because sweat instantly runs away.
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He, who laughs last, laughs best.
He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.
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Bears only poop in the woods when Chuck Norris says its ok..
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Chuck Norris can squeeze orange juice from a banana.
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The reason Tom Cruise runs in all his movies is because he's running the hell away from Chuck Norris.
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Scooby Doo prefers Norris snacks'.
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In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine.
But then Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.
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Chuck Norris puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like the rest of us.
The only difference is, then he kills people.
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When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people.
He walks through them
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