The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris can fold airplanes into paper.
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Insurance never covers you against damage sustained by Chuck Norris, as it's classed as an Act of God!
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Chuck Norris' favorite game is winning.
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Chuck Norris's urin is said to add 300 horse power when added to your gas.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Wonder Woman's magic Lasso is actually one of Chuck Norris' chest hairs.
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Chuck Norris didn't sign the Declaration of Idependence because he wanted the British to think they had chance.
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The creation of a perfect sphere became possible after Chuck Norris became enraged with a rubix cube and roundhouse kicked the corners off it.
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Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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