The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
Chuck Norris created the World Wide Web using a typewriter.
The Dead Sea was once alive before Chuck Norris bathed there.
When Chuck Norris crosses the pacific, swimming, sharks hear the "Jaws" music.
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
Chuck Norris can play the violin with a piano.
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.
Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a horse.