Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number, you pick up the wrong phone
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard.
There is only another fist.
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Chuck Norris would have attacked the Death Star with the Shield Generator still up.
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Gravity obeys Chuck Norris.
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If you carefully examine your health insurance policy, you will see that there is no cover for "Chuck Norris related incidents".
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A Klondike bar would do anything for a Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunscreen, the sun wears Chuck Norris-screen.
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When Chuck Norris falls over, the ground needs a band-aid
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