Chuck Norris uses paper to cut scissors.
Where does the devil go when he dies? He goes to Chuck Norris for an eternity of roundhouse kicks.
Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
Chuck Norris doesn’t shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.
Big Brother isn't watching you. Chuck Norris is watching you!
When Chuck Norris enters into a courtroom, the judge stands up.
Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
Chuck Norris won the Boston marathon in New York.
"Killed it" is a figure of speech implying someone stopped the banter. To Chuck Norris that's just the motto of his life.