When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can travel back in time into the future.
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Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
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When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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Don King once had straight hair, until that day he saw Chuck Norris' eyes staring him down.
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The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
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Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
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When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris asked his script writer for more dialogue and the script writer said "Chuck you mean more grunting?"
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Chuck Norris is so hot he makes the sun sweat.
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