Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks. They fold under pressure.
Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear. The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
Chuck Norris doesn't use web standards as the web will conform to him.
If Clint Eastwood told Chuck Norris to get off his lawn... Chuck would get the hell off his lawn!
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
Someone once videotaped Chuck Norris getting pissed off. It was called Walker: Texas Chain Saw Masacre.
Chuck Norris once shot someone with a knife.
Chuck Norris sky dives without a parachute.
Chuck Norris can close Pandora's Box.
Chuck Norris has hair of steel wool. That's why his mullet never moves.