Chuck Norris walks up his staircase to get to the basement.
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Chuck Norris sends his beard clippings to the police.
They are used as bullet proof vests.
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Chuck Norris didn't have a mum or dad, he created himself.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers.
The food cooks itself out of pressure.
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Once an email was sent from LA to Washington.
Chuck Stopped it at St. Louis.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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Chuck norris once ate a rubix cube and pooped it out solved.
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Chuck Norris can whistle in five different languages, including sign language.
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Chuck Norris can unlock a hairpin with a door.
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Chuck Norris made an armless man tap out.
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