Chuck Norris has the iPhone 5...he got it back in '84.
Chuck Norris doesn't beat around the bush, he beats up the bush.
Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.
Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard? He didn't, his beard grew him.
Chuck Norris has only one friend on Facebook: Pain.
If Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you, even Google won't be able to find you.
If Chuck Norris met Dora the Explorer, he'd introduce her to his Boots.
Ozzy Osbourne once snorted a line of ants. Chuck Norris once snorted a line of bricks.
Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
Chuck Norris once separated his powers into five people, they are now called The Avengers.