Chuck Norris has the iPhone 5...he got it back in '84.
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There are no weapons of mass destruction.
Just Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear.
He sleeps with a real bear.
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Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.
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Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The result was The Great Pyramids.
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Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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The sun is Chuck Norris's pocket flashlight.
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Chuck Norris is the only one who doesn't have to tell PayPal to switch the funding source to his credit card.
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The secret ingredient in the KFC recipe is Chuck Norris' approval.
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Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.
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Chuck Norris knows what's eating Gilbert Grape.
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