Chuck Norris can travel back in time into the future.
The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".
Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
Chuck Norris helps little old ladies cross the street... Bad guys get kicked to the curb!
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
Chuck Norris once dropped a glass vase onto the floor. The glass apologized for breaking in his presence.
Bruce Wayne first tried wearing a Chuck Norris mask to inspire fear, until he saw himself in the mirror. He immediately changed to the Batman
Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
The Titanic didn't sink by an ice burg, Chuck Norris was doing the back stroke across the Atlantic.