Q: What would you get if you cross a trumpet and a serpent?
A: A snake in the brass.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bug hunt as that signifies a probability of failure, he goes bug killing.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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What do you call a frog with no legs?
It doesn't matter- he won't come anyway.
A passenger train is creeping along, slowly.
Finally it creaks to a halt.
A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside.
"What's going on?" she yells out the window.
"Cow on the track!" replies the conductor.
Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace.
Within five minutes, however, it stops again.
The woman sees the same conductor walk again.
She leans out the window and yells, "What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?"
What is a dolphin's favorite TV show?
Whale of fortune.
Q: If your wife is shouting at the front door and your dog is barking at the back door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog, of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in.
You said it was a great horse and it is.
It took twenty other horses to beat him!
What would happen if tarantulas were as big as horses?
If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital!
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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