Chuck Norris can fall up.
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Chuck Norris can use a touch screen without touching it.
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Love is one way to get to a persons heart the other is Chuck Norris' fists.
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One day Chuck Norris went into Wal Mart.
The clerk told him to have a nice day.
The next day the clerk was found dead.
The police asked Chuck Norris if he killed her and he said yes so they asked him why.
He said " Nobody tells Chuck Norris what to do"
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris had a baby he was horny for the nurse and had a 70-inch long.
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In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague.
The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
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Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid, he wanted to see if you really could kill two birds with a stone.
Let's just say that's why birds fly still south in the winter.
Some people have alter egos.
Chuck Norris has no such thing.
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