Chuck Norris can put out fire with gasoline.
Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
Chuck Norris didn't go to school to learn, he went to teach.
After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris. The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
Only Chuck Norris can cross the "Beyond" section of Bed, Bath and Beyond store.
Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
Chuck Norris's black belt was made in a black hole.
Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it. Dissapointed, he then walked out.