Chuck Norris can put out fire with gasoline.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers. He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
Chuck Norris has never received an electricity bill, he powers everything with his rage
Do you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow? You just don't follow him that close!
Stonehenge was made by Chuck Norris stacking blocks as a baby.
Chuck Norris goes to the Bermuda Triangle for vacation.
Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.