Chuck Norris goes to the Bermuda Triangle for vacation.
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While vacationing in France, Chuck Norris went out for a casual bike ride and accidentally won the Tour de France.
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July 4th is Independence day.
And the day Chuck Norris was born.
Coincidence? I think not.
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When Superman wants vacation time it has to be approved by Chuck Norris.
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We ask the president to make laws.
The president asks Chuck Norris.
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They say, "You can't fight city hall", but Chuck Norris can.
It's not much of a fight....
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Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you.
Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
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A Lalu brought a simple, spendthrift wife from a small town in Bihar.
He convinced her that they should go for Honeymoon.
The wife would not understand complex term as honeymoon and kept asking for explanation.
Lalu said, "Let me feel you my manhood in Honeymoon and you would know."
They went.
Had lots of fun and came back.
Wife back at home asked, "I still don’t understand what is this honeymoon that we went for."
The Husband said, "Oh, we were together, had so many hugs, kisses, varieties of sex, jokes, fun all that is honeymoon."
The spendthrift wife got angry, "You should have told me that before. Back in town, Malu, Kalu, Suru and I were together all the times, and had this fun without spending a dime of my money."
While inspecting their honeymoon suite, the bride discovers a little box attached to the bed.
"What's this for?" she asks her husband.
"If you put a quarter in," he says, reaching into his pocket, "the bed starts vibrating."
"Save your money," she says. "When you're a quarter in, I start vibrating."
A man and his ever nagging wife were on holiday in Jerusalem, when the wife suddenly died.
The funeral company told the man that it would cost 45000 to ship her home or $500 to bury her in Jerusalem.
The husband said "ship her home".
Shocked, the undertaker asked "but sir, why don't you bury her in the Holy Land and save the money ?"
The husband replied "a long time ago, a man was buried here and 3 days later, he rose from the dead ... I cant take the chance !"
Kids dream about having superpowers.
Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
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