Joke #7589

Chuck Norris can headbutt himself in the face.
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Time travel is possible. But you must first get past Chuck Norris...
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Chuck Norris can buy priceless moments. At a discount price.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do his taxes.....he just sends a blank tax form with his picture on it.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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Chuck Norris does not cleanse himself with your everyday shower. He uses Meteor Showers.
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Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
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Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris would have attacked the Death Star with the Shield Generator still up.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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For breakfast Chuck Norris enjoys toast and jellyfish.
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