Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris doesn't always drink beer, but when he does he has the dos equis guy serve it to him in a dress.
Chuck Norris protects his airbag in an accident.
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
In France, Chuck Norris accidentally won Tour de France by exercise bike.
Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
Chuck Norris can solve the Towers of Hanoi in one move.
Chuck Norris can play Pokemon Go on his landline.
Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.