Chuck Norris doesnt walk, the earth moves under his feet.
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Scientists did not in fact slipt the atom, Chuck Norris just roundhouse kicked it.
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Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At night.
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Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
Never ask Chuck Norris for an autograph.
Why?
Because Chuck's signature is a straight roundhouse kick to the face.
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Angelina Jolie can curve a bullet. Chuck Norris can curve a laser.
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Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
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When Chuck Norris runs backwards during a fight, it may seem like he's retreating.
He's not. He's just attacking from another direction.
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Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids.
We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size.
When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
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