Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
Chuck Norris can breath out with his nose and breath in with his mouth at the same time.
Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
Chuck Norris beat the Hulk in an arm wreslting contest... with his leg.
If you took all the worlds Super Heroes and combined them, Chuck would still kill them instantly.
The Tower of Pisa was in Chuck Norris' way.