Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
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Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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Love does not conquer all.
Chuck Norris does.
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Chuck Norris went on Man vs Wild once.
The Wild lost.
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Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.
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There are no such things as Chuck Norris haters...just people with short lives.
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Chuck Norris can paint the rainbow... with black.
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The tides don't change because of the moon; the sea just wants to be as far away as possible from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
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Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard.
They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
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Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
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