Chuck Norris doesn't expect the unexpected. He knows the unexpected.
Chuck Norris destroyed all life in a place called Happy Valley. We know it today as Death Valley.
Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
Chuck Norris can throw a house through a window.
Chuck Norris won the World Horseshoe Pitching Contest while they were still attached to a Clydesdale.
Chuck Norris can cut a saw with a wood board.
Chuck Norris once cried just to see what it was like. The end result was the creation of life.
Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
A time paradox was invented when Chuck Norris went back in time to raise himself. Now he has provoked the event 2012.
Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.