Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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Chuck Norris once had a weak moment, just to know what it felt like.
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Chuck Norris does not eat.
Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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Chuck Norris can break air.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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Superman's weakness is kryptonite, kryptonite's weakness is Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
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To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
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When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
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Chuck Norris' sweat is used to disinfect operating rooms.
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