Guns need a licence to bear Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
Every bone inside Chuck Norris is his funny bone, cause he laughs wherever you hit him.
Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
Chuck Norris once won a drag race with a unicycle.
Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.
Justin Bieber was inspired by Usher because of his music and dance, Usher was inspired by Michael Jackson The King of Pop, Michael Jackson was inspired by...Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was asked if he would be running for President, after a chuckle, he stated, nothing makes him run.