Evolution ended the day Chuck Norris was born.
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King Kong climbed the Empire State Building because Chuck Norris was waiting at the bottom.
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Chuck Norris does not own a house.
He walks into random houses and people move.
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Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
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Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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Chuck Norris can make scissors beat rock.
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When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
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Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
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Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb.
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Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.
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