Chuck Norris doesn't beat around the bush, he beats up the bush.
Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
Bob the Builder asks if we can fix it, Chuck Norris already did.
Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face. Nobody would survive anyway.
Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?" Chuck Norris is your daddy.
If it were true that you are what you eat. Then you are about to be a roundhouse kick.
When Chuck Norris plays dodge ball... the balls dodge him.
You can't win a starring contest with Chuck Norris becuase when you look in to his eyes you see hell starring right back at you.
Chuck Norris once strangled a man with the mans own eyelash.
Chuck Norris is so sharp you can cut yourself just by looking at him.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.