Q: How does a blonde order a root beer?
A: Extra large, hold the roots.
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Three blondes are stranded on an island.
A fairy comes along and says that she will grant each person a wish.
So the first blonde says she wants to be really smart so she digs and finds a cell phone and calls the Army.
The second blonde says that she wants to be even smarter so she finds a flair and sets it off.
The third blonde says that she wants to be even smarter than both of them, so the fairy changes her hair color to black and she says,"Let's go over the bridge."
Vote:
How many blondes does it take to play hide and seek?
One.
Two blondes wait at a bus stop.
A bus pulls up and opens the door.
One of the blondes leans inside and asks the driver, "Will this bus take me to 5th Avenue?"
The bus driver shakes his head and says, "No, I'm sorry."
The other blonde leans inside and asks, "How about ME?"
A blonde woman is walking down the street, with her blouse open.
A cop is approaching from about a block away, thinking, "Boy, my eyes must be going, it looks like that woman's right boob is hanging out."
As he gets closer it becomes apparent that it "IS" hanging out.
When he gets face to face with her he says, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"
She says, "Why, officer?"
"Well, your boob is hanging out."
She looks down and says "OMIGOD, I left the baby on the bus!"
Blonde Overdue
A blonde goes into a library and cheerfully says, "Hi! I'm here to see the doctor!"
In a stern, but hushed voice, the librarian says, "Miss, this is a library."
So the blonde lowers her voice and says, "Oh sorry!"
Then whispers, "I'm here to see the doctor.
How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves?
She fell out of the tree.
How is a blond with makeup called?
Simpleminded picture.
One day, a blonde goes into a store. She gets an item and walks up to the cashier. She says,"I'd like to buy this TV".
He says,"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes".
The next day, she dyes her hair red and goes back in the store, but the same thing happens.
Finally, she shaves her head and goes back in. When she tries to buy it for the third time, the man refuses.
She says, "How the hell do you know I'm blonde?".
He replied, "First of all, that's a microwave."
A blonde decides to join the military thinking she can meet a few guys.
What is wrong with this joke?
1. This isn't a joke
2. The blonde is thinking
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead were stuck on an island for many, many years until one day they found a magic lamp.
They rubbed it hard and out popped a genie.
He said that he could only give three wishes so since there were three girls, each would get one wish.
The redhead went first. "I hate it here. It is too hot and boring. I want to go home!"
"Okay," replied the genie.
And off she went.
Then the brunette went.
"I miss my family, my friends and relatives. I want to go home, too!"
And off she went.
The blonde started crying and said, "I wish my friends were back here!"