Joke #8485

Q: How does a blonde order a root beer? A: Extra large, hold the roots.
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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are crossing an enchanted bridge in Magical Fairyland when they run into a fairy. The fairy says that they can be granted a transformation if they jump off the bridge and call out their wish. The brunette immediately jumps off the bridge and yells "Eagle!" She turns into a beautiful bird of prey and flies away. The redhead jumps off the bridge and yells out "Salmon!" She turns into a gorgeous shimmering salmon and swims upstream to spawn. The blonde is at this point so excited that she jumps off the bridge without thinking of her wish. She panics. "Crap!"
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How did the blonde burn her nose? Bobbing for chips.
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What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back
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Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medicine cabinet? Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills.
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If you drop a blonde and a brunette 100ft, which hits the ground first? The brunette. The blonde has to ask directions on the way down.
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How do you confuse a blonde? You don’t, they’re born that way!
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Q: What did the blonde say when the airplane began to shake? A: Must be an earthquake.
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A blonde finds a lamp with a genie inside. He says, "I will grant you three wishes." The blonde says, "For my first wish, I want my love handles to disappear." The genie replies, "Your wish is my command." Suddenly, the blonde exclaims, "Holy sh*t! What did you do with my ears?"
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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around!
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A blonde has sharp pains in her side. The doctor examines her and says, "You have acute appendicitis." The blonde says, "That's sweet, doc, but I came here to get medical help."
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