The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas.
He just hired Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
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The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
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This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad.
He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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Q: If athletes get athlete's foot, what do elves get?
A: Mistle-toes!
Chuck Norris's black belt was made in a black hole.
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The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real.
It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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