Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
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The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas.
He just hired Chuck Norris.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
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The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
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This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad.
He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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What did one Christmas tree say to the other?
You've got a lot of balls walking in here dressed like that.
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
Chuck Norris is an action verb.
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