Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
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The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas.
He just hired Chuck Norris.
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The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
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The Grinch steals Christmas from Santa, Chuck Norris steals Christmas from the Grinch.
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This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad.
He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
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What did the big angel say to the little angel on Christmas Eve?
Answer: "Halo there!"
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Q: What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common?
A: They both have balls just for decoration.
Chuck Norris can put out a fire using nothing but gasoline.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia.
While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
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