Chuck Norris doesn't need to wear steel toes, his toes already are.
When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia. While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Bigfoot thinks Chuck Norris is a myth
Chuck Norris doesn't wear seatbelts. Seatbelts wear Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can blow the answers away from the wind.
Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
Lays chips claims "No one can eat just one". Wrong. Chuck Norris ate ONE, laughed then ate a whole bag of Doritos.