Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.
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Transformers are just another name for Chuck Norris' grade 5 science project.
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If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till."
After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
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Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
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When chuck Norris was in school, he made his PE teacher run laps.
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Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy.
"There were no survivors."
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When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the weights get stronger.
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Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.
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We'll want to preserve Chuck Norris for future generations, when he dies.
We won't be needing cryogenics cos Chuck's already frozen.
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Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.
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Chuck Norris dosn't need a gun, he points an says pow!
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