Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light.
He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
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Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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Freddy Krueger has nightmares of Chuck Norris
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If you say Chuck Norris' name in Mongolia, the people there will roundhouse kick you in his honor.
Their kick will be followed by the REAL roundhouse delivered by none other than Norris himself.
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Chuck Norris beat a black hole in a tug of war.
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You don't invite Chuck Norris.
He invites himself.
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Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
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Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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