Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light.
He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
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Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
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There were 3 people on a boat, Chuck Norris, Jesus, and the Penelope, Jesus said
"I bet I can walk across the water."
He did, Chuck Norris tried, he did, the Penelope said
"They did it that means I do it." ,
He tried, he sank, Jesus said: "Should I have told him about the rocks?"
Chuck Norris said "What rocks?"
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Chuck Norris stopped playing golf after that unfortunate incident with the dinosaurs.
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According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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Cocaine is Addicted to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris invented his own brand of media disc.
The Black and Blueray.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
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Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
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Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.
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The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.
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