Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light.
He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Kings buy Chuck Norris size beds.
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Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
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The Titanic sunk because Chuck Norris ran into it during his swim.
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Chuck Norris wears boots to protect the Earth from his feet.
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Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can deliver a roundhouse kick in full 1080p, remember that the next time you watch Walker Texas Ranger in Blu-Ray.
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Before god said, "Let there be light," he asked Chuck Norris,"Can light let there be?"
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Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
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