Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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Chuck Norris cancelled his own funeral.
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Chuck Norris once stayed at the Hotel California and was allowed to check out... and leave.
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Chuck Norris was the reason the Titanic sank.
The iceberg was just a cover-up.
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Chuck Norris has never won a single fight.
Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
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Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
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Chuck Norris can do a downward uppercut.
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Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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There are no bombs, Chuck Norris just jumps out of a helicopter and punches the ground.
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Chuck Norris can fold airplanes into paper.
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Chuck Norris puts the 'laughter' in 'manslaughter'.
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