Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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A train saw Chuck Norris on the track and turned down a dirt road.
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Chuck Norris once caught the Ebola virus, it's been on the run ever since.
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Chuck Norris doesn't daydream.
He's too busy giving other people nightmares.
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Chuck Norris' beard has it's own Social Security number.
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Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
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Chuck Norris once ran in a movie marathon.... and won.
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Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
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Chuck Norris made Newton write 3 laws of physics just to break them... he was having a boring weekend.
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When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris won a staring contest with his eyes closed.
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