Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay.
Big mistake.
You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
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Chuck Norris discovered America.
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Chuck Norris doesn't prepare dinner; dinner knows when to be ready.
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Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters?
3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
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When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
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Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine.
He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself.
Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
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Rome wasn't built in a day because they didn't ask Chuck Norris for help.
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Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
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Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
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Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
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