Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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Chuck Norris's motorcycle has 4WD.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
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Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris watches Saturday Night Live on Friday.
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The tides don't change because of the moon; the sea just wants to be as far away as possible from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.
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When Chuck Norris plays sudoku, he can put two same numbers in one square and still solve it right.
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
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Chick Norris has never pooped because nothing scares the shot out of Chuck Norris.
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