Chuck Norris went up Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth. The next day he won the lottery.
Chuck Norris is the reason terrorists hide in caves.
There is no backspace button on Chuck Norris' keyboard. Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunscreen, the sun wears Chuck Norris-screen.
Chuck Norris can check his facebook on a typewriter.
Chuck Norris texts with punctuation.
The Animal Crackers that Chuck Norris eats are made from real animals.
Chuck Norris bought out the Walt Disney Company with a car-wash token.
When Chuck Norris logged in to WoW, everyone logged out.
Before his rise to fame, Jaws was Chuck Norris's goldfish.