Chuck Norris does not require food, drink, shelter, or sleep, only confirmed kills.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a case for his phone.
The ground is afraid to break it.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids.
We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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When Chuck Norris has your back you aren't likely to get it back again.
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Crop Circles are Chuck Norris's preschool art projects.
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The original plan for Hiroshima and Nagasaki was to send in Chuck Norris.
We decided to go the humane route.
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If Chuck Norris was a villian in a video game, you'll never win.
But if he was the hero, it's unplayable; because no one controls Chuck Norris.
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I had an idea once, and a light bulb appeared over my head.
Chuck Norris had an idea, and the sun was created.
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Ozzy Osbourne bites the heads off of bats.
Chuck Norris bites the heads off of Siberian Tigers.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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When Alexander Bell invented the telephone he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris
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