If you took all the worlds Super Heroes and combined them, Chuck would still kill them instantly.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Christano Roanaldo dives because he thinks of Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord. He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
Underneath China it says "Made in Chuck Norris".
Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
Jedis are now taught to use the "Chuck".
Chuck Norris isn't on Earth, the Earth is on Chuck Norris.