Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
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Karma believes in Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris invented the spoon because it's too easy to kill someone with a knife or fork.
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Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
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Chuck Norris can suck a black hole.
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Chuck Norris doesn't solve math - math solves Chuck Norris.
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Bruce Lee is the only person that lived from a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
He died a year later.
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When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
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Right angles used to be called wrong angles until Chuck said, "I don't see anything wrong with them."
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There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
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Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
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