Chuck Norris's Blood Type is AK-47.
In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague. The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick with his arms.
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone. His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
Two halves make a whole. Two wholes make Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was once shot. The bullet died.
When Chuck Norris talks, people listen. When he doesn't, people still listen.
Chuck Norris has a six-pack on his chin.