Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Chuck Norris once taught a French Bulldog to be English.
Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
Chuck Norris' beard has it's own Social Security number.
Q: What's the easiest way to a persons heart? A: Chuck Norris' fist
Chuck Norris is a fact.
When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does. NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris sheds his skin twice a year.