Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to face the consequences, the consequences have to face Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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Chuck Norris can split the atom.
With his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris can play a PS3 with a Super Nintendo controller, and it works!
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Chuck Norris can drive a car without gas... or an engine.
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Chuck Norris could actually win on Takeshi's Castle.
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Chuck Norris donates his beard clippings to the Army so they can make Kevlar vests.
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Cats are allergic to Chuck Norris.
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