Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
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Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
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Chuck Norris can sit in the shade...in an open field.
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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
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Chuck Norris can light the contents of the Windows recycle bin on fire.
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No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.
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Chuck Norris is allowed to draw pictures of Mohammad.
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Chuck Norris doesn't moon walk, the moon Chuck-Norris Walks.
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How did Stella get her groove back?
Permission from Chuck Norris.
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The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.
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Never ask Chuck Norris for an autograph.
Why?
Because Chuck's signature is a straight roundhouse kick to the face.
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