Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
Chuck Norris can open PDF files with Microsoft Excel.
The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't always drink beer, but when he does he has the dos equis guy serve it to him in a dress.
Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you. Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
Chuck Norris hates both the player and the game.
Teacher to student "Why is every answer on your test 'Chuck Norris'?" Student to teacher "Chuck Norris is the answer to all problems!"
Chuck Norris can break air.
Chuck Norris dosen't get lost... Everything around him is in the wrong place!
50Cent used to be called DollarBill but Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked him to the face and now he's half the man he used to be.