Chuck Norris once planted a box of Cheerios in his yard, the result was a donut tree.
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There is a way to kill Chuck Norris, it is...
Sorry, the person typing this just had his head bashed in by a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris can beat everyone.
Except for 1 person.
Chuck Norris.
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When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
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Chuck Norris grew a beard at the age of eighteen.
Twice.
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Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids.
Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
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Chuck Norris can make ice cubes with a microwave.
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Chuck Norris isn't a good shot, his bullets just know better than to miss.
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Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.
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