Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
Most leading hand sanitizers say that they can kil 99.99% of all germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100% of WHATEVER HE WANTS.
Chuck Norris can paint himself into a corner and still get the job done.
Chuck Norris can get a Pepsi out of a Coke machine.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
Chuck Norris's 1st Grade teacher asked him how many stars there were on the American Flag. Chuck Norris replied "Yes." and was correct.
Chuck Norris can find the end of a circle.
Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
The reason Waldo hides is because he saw Chuck Norris looking for him.
When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.