Chuck Norris created the Grand Canyon because he coughed "Just Once".
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What does the fox say?
Whatever the hell Chuck Norris tells him to.
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The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-.
These are also Chuck Norris' initials.
This is not a coincidence.
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Usually when kids go to sleep they sleep with a teddy bear...
Chuck Norris sleeps with an actual bear
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Chuck Norris doesn't have an Ipod, he has an Ifist.
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Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
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hen Chuck Norris goes fishing he stands at the edge of the water and says: "Don`t make me go in there to get you".
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When Chuck Norris throws a throwing knife, the knife doesn't kill his victim, the force of the air did.
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Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up.
Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
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Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.
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When Chuck Norris put his hand over a magnet, the magnet comes to him out of pure fear.
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