When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks, physics decides to shut up.
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Chuck Norris uses gasoline as aftershave just for the pleasant tingling sensation.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Chuck Norris can alphabetize m&m's
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Chuck Norris plays Scrabble with numbers.
And wins.
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Scooby Doo prefers Norris snacks'.
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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Chuck Norris can drink from an empty cup.
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When Neil Armstrong first landed on the moon he saw aliens worshiping Chuck Norris's footprints.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
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