Chuck Norris didn't cross the road... he was already on the other side...
Chuck Norris can obtain unobtainable.
When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.
Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink. If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
Chuck Norris once walked down a street with his fists in his pockets. He was then arrested for concealing two deadly weapons.
Chuck Norris is spelled with a silent "awesome".
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.
Chuck Norris once won a game of Space Invaders without shooting.