Chuck Norris didn't cross the road... he was already on the other side...
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When you google up Chuck Norris, he googles you back for revenge.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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Chuck Norris does not need to freeze water to make ice, he just stares at water and scares it stiff.
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Chuck Norris once decided to dig a hole, today we call it the Grand Canyon.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do cocaine.
Cocaine does Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris beat the Hulk in an arm wreslting contest... with his leg.
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Chuck Norris' day consists of 25 hours.
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In high school, Chuck Norris was voted "Most."
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Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
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