Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris went up Niagra Falls in a barrel.
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Chuck Norris caught them all with one PokeBall.
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Lactose is Chuck Norris intolerant.
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Chuck Norris has never won a single fight.
Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
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If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
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Chuck Norris can strum your pain with his fingers, tell your whole life with his words – but mainly just kill you softly with his song.
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Don King once had straight hair, until that day he saw Chuck Norris' eyes staring him down.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
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According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
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30 lumberjacks once tried to cut off Chuck Norris's beard...
They were never seen again.
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