Most kids pee their name into snow... Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
Someone asked Chuck Norris to climb Mount Everest. After his 10th endeavor, he wrote a book. "Ten Different Ways to Climb Mount Everest"
In space Chuck Norris can hear your screams.
July 4th is Independence day. And the day Chuck Norris was born. Coincidence? I think not.
Sticks and stones may break your bones but Chuck Norris' fists will kill you.
A time paradox was invented when Chuck Norris went back in time to raise himself. Now he has provoked the event 2012.
In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay. Big mistake. You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons. None of it is his own.
When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.