Chuck Norris can hit a grand slam with no one on base.
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The sun is the burning remains of the last planet Chuck Norris pillaged.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
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A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
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Chuck Norris can make a pound cake with only an ounce.
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Extra Terrestrials often visit Earth from other galaxies - they're here to see if Chuck Norris really exists.
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When Chuck Norris goes to the gym the treadmill sweats.
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Chuck Norris beat Super Mario Galaxie 2 in the big dipper... before Nintendo was invented.
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Charlie Sheen winning?
Chuck Norris says "I think not."
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CBS hired Chuck Norris to replace Charlie Sheen, now the show is called Ten and half Men.
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Chuck Norris blows out trick candles.
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