Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris' Internet connection is faster upstream than downstream because even data has more incentive to run from him than to him.
Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris sleeps until he tells the sun to get up.
After Chuck Norris was born, he drove himself back home.
Chuck Norris rubs two pieces of fire together to make wood.
If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.
Chuck Norris made a statue bleed.
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
When Chuck Norris plays hide and seek, even google can't find him.