Chuck Norris can do a downward uppercut.
Chuck Norris can find Osama Bin Laden!
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself
Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.
Chuck Norris was once in a catch 22, but he roundhouse kicked it down to to a 12 pack and literally drank his problems away.
If Chuck Norris killed Kenny, he'd stay dead.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names.
Chuck Norris has never used a question mark in his life.