Chuck Norris is the reason terrorists hide in caves.
It is a fact that Chuck Norris cannot cry, this is because his tearducts are too muscular.
Chuck Norris' jokes don't have punchlines. They have footprints.
Chuck Norris can set water on fire. He can also set fire on water.
Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris. His voice is still up there today.
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
Q: What's a terrorists favorite American football team? A: The New York Jets.
Chuck Norris once saw Spiderman on a wall and then folded his newspaper.
I went to an ISIS birthday party once. The musical chairs were a bit slow but fuck me the pass the parcel was quick.
I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend today. I had to drop the bomb two or three times before she finally got it.