What do you call a deer with no eyes? I have no I-Deer.
What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs? An elephant with diarrhea.
When is a farmer like a magician? When he turns his cow into pasture.
What do you call a dinosaur that destroys everything in its path? Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.
What do you get when a cow goes to the Beach with tanning oil? Pre-tanned leather.
Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man? A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"
Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.
Did you hear about Mike Tyson's horse? It got angry and bit at the champ!
If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped. What's a tiger? A stri-ped.
Tom was walking down the street when he sees a funeral procession. At the head was the casket, behind was a man walking a very large dog and behind him were 300 people. Tom walks over to the guy with the dog and asks who’s funeral is this? The man answers, “My mother-in-law’s.” Tom wishes his condolences and asks, “She must of been a very important person, but what’s with the dog?” He answers, “This is the dog that killed her!” So Tom asks, “can I borrow the dog for an hour?” He responds, “Get on line!”