Stars wish upon Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress balls.
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If Chuck Norris were a toy, everything about it would be hazardous.
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Chuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.
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Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you.
Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
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A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
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Latin insulted Chuck Norris.
It is now a dead language.
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Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
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Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he taught his parents to stay away from strangers.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked the turbines of Hoover Dam.
Since then, the Colorado River is a tourist attraction.
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